From First Dates to Weddings: HSBC Survey Reveals Financial Conversations Are Still a Challenge for Couples
Financial compatibility is crucial to relationship success – yet many delay money talks until engagement or marriage
75% of couples say financial compatibility is crucial to relationship success-yet 41% delay money talks until engagement or marriage: HSB UK
- 75% of couples consider financial compatibility crucial to their relationship.
- 36% of Brits spend between £50-£100 on a first date.
- 35% of respondents have declined a wedding invitation due to financial constraints.
- 41% of couples postpone financial discussions until engagement or marriage.
Despite being one of the biggest factors in long-term relationship success, money is still a taboo topic for most couples. New research from HSBC UK reveals that three in four Brits (75%) consider financial compatibility essential.
The nationwide survey of 2,000 adults explored how modern couples navigate finances. This includes everything from dating apps to wedding vows. It also examined the pressures, expectations, and unspoken rules that come with spending in relationships.
The impact of this silence is clear, with 58% of couples having argued about money.
“This research reveals opportunities for better financial communication. Money talks aren’t just about budgeting. They are about trust, priorities, and building a future together,” says Carl Watchorn, Head of Customer Propositions.
“But many people still struggle to bring finances into the conversation, even as life gets more expensive. Breaking that silence earlier can make a real difference to couples’ wellbeing.”
First dates: who’s paying?
When it comes to first dates, over a third (36%) of Brits spend between £50-£100. Age plays a significant role in spending habits. Among these, 25–34-year-olds are most to invest more in first impressions. Nearly 13% spend £301-£400. In contrast, those aged 55+ opt for more modest dating experiences. They have an average spend of £92.
Splitting the bill equally is now the most common approach among Brits (36%), reflecting evolving attitudes towards dating expenses. The research shows older generations are particularly comfortable with sharing costs, with 50% of 45–54-year-olds preferring to split.
Regional differences also paint a clear picture. Londoners spend an average of £260 on first dates. This is compared to £132 in Leeds and £144 in Plymouth.
When do couples talk money?
Despite recognising how important financial compatibility is, many couples are putting off meaningful conversations until major milestones:
- 41% wait until engagement or marriage before having serious money talks.
- 40% wait until moving in together.
- Over a third (35%) only tackle finances when a problem arises.
More worrying is that while 35% couples handle money matters when issues arise, 28% avoid these conversations altogether.
When it comes to joint finances, marriage remains a key catalyst for financial merger. Seventy-one percent of married couples keep a joint account. In comparison, just 30% of dating couples do so. These accounts are used mostly for bills (52%), followed by shared savings goals (32%) and holidays (20%).
“There’s still a sense of awkwardness or even fear around talking about money – especially early on,” adds Carl. “But honest conversations about spending habits, saving goals and priorities can prevent conflict and set couples up for longer-term success.”
Financial impact of weddings
When it comes to tying the knot, the research revealed a significant expectation vs. reality gap in spending:
- UK couples overspend on their wedding day by 31%, with the average cost hitting £13,520, over £3,000 above budget
- Married 25–34-year-olds spend the most, exceeding their wedding budget by 46%, spending £21,553 on average compared to a planned £14,706
It’s not just couples feeling the financial pinch. Guests are also feeling it. They spend an average of £473 to attend a single wedding. This is primarily on accommodation (33%), outfits (17%), and gifts (15%).
That cost is leading to tough decisions. 35% of people have declined a wedding invite for financial reasons. This figure rises to 48% among 25–34s.
Carl Watchorn adds: “Today’s couples are navigating the delicate balance between creating their dream wedding and maintaining financial wellbeing. While social pressures can influence spending decisions, we’re seeing more couples having open conversations about costs and priorities. This shift towards financial transparency is helping people celebrate life’s big moments while staying true to their long-term financial goals.”
“From first dates to wedding days, the research shows that money conversations play a crucial role in modern relationships, At HSBC UK, we’re here to help couples have more open discussions about finances, offering practical tools and guidance to support them at every stage of their relationship journey.”
HSBC UK’s Savings Goals feature is now helping customers set almost 20,000 goals every month. These goals range from honeymoons to house deposits. Since launching, over 100,000 goals have already been created, with one in ten already achieved.
At HSBC UK, couples can access free budgeting tools. They also have joint savings features and expert support. This helps them navigate every stage of their financial journey together. HSBC UK also offers a wide range of current account options to help you stay on track with your finances.
